What Is Your Question?
Powerful questions have been a theme of coaching since I first got trained as a professional coach in 2007. In my coaching school there was an entire course dedicated to the skill of questioning. Powerful questions can allow the client to gain new understanding and clarity about issues around which they’ve been stuck.
But sometimes a powerful question doesn’t have an immediate answer. I suppose that’s partly why it is a powerful question; if it had an immediate answer, it would just be an easy question, not a powerful one. So it’s not uncommon for a client to say “I don’t know” to one of my questions.
“I don’t know” is a perfect answer. When this happens, I reassure the client that it’s fine to not know yet, but encourage him or her to take the question “home” with them and keep it in their metaphorical back pocket. If they hold it with them throughout their day, the answer will eventually come.
We’re not used to asking questions to which we don’t know the answer. It’s actually kind of uncomfortable because it acknowledges that we are now in a limbo state.
But here’s what a powerful question to which you don’t know the answer does:
It sends the message that we are officially seeking the answer
It allows us to gain consciousness as we open ourselves to answers
It frames out the next missing piece that will move us forward along our path
If there’s something you’re wrestling with, can you frame the missing piece as a powerful question? Actually, part of the criteria for the question is that you at first feel like you don’t know the answer. Then can you commit to keeping the question close during the “I don’t know” phase until hints of an answer begin to emerge?
Here are some examples of powerful questions:
What is causing me to hesitate on this decision?
How can I increase my confidence?
Are there any clues in my feeling state or environment that are precursors to a behavior I’m trying to change?
What is my next step?
There’s never one right answer to a powerful question. But you’ll know when you hit on a piece of the answer that is right and true for you.
