Small Town USA Reminders of Resilience

I recently made an unexpected trip to my hometown in Northern New York to help my dad, who had been ill. I always appreciate having the opportunity to immerse myself back into the culture of my hometown in rural America. It reminds me that I came from a place where many live rather differently from those of us here in major metropolitan areas.

Humanity defines rural america in so many ways

Here are a few things I'm reminded of during my visits to Upstate NY -- and from rural America at large -- about resilience.

Community is a NECESSITY

The house I grew up in, where my dad still lives now, is heated exclusively with firewood. In many ways, this requires him to stay active  even at 72 years old. However, when he gets sick, it becomes a liability. 

Winters in upstate New York are no joke, and people help each other out when they can. When my dad had been sick for a week and his car was buried in snow, my sister, from Idaho, called a friend who lives nearby. That friend spent over an hour at my dad's house, digging out his car and bringing in firewood. He had nothing to gain from this act except maybe the feeling that he had been of service to someone in need.

Reality is real

For me, death feels closer when I'm home in rural upstate New York. If you're from a small town, you always know of people who have died recently. As a teenager, it's common to have friends, or at least friends of friends, who have died in car accidents or other tragedies. This presence of death and the darkness of winter combine to weigh heavy, shrouding the quiet nights like a dense fog. There's a feeling in the cultural ethos that we are just waiting out winter, and so we try to enjoy the daylight. Three o’clock in the afternoon has a melancholy bittersweet feeling as the sun sparkles across the snow and the shadows extend -- it's so beautiful but you know it's not going to last.

differences coexist

My hometown is still a place where political differences can coexist. These differences are out in the open, on the table, and not generally a threat to severe relationships. This is because people's political views do not define them -- their humanity does. Their humanity does because it has to. They are one notch closer to the land and closer to the fact that we need each other for survival. My extended family ranges from those with advanced degrees to those who dropped out of high school. They remain connected. This is Elise Stefanik territory, but there's a strong sense of Hillary Clinton's tagline, "We're in this together."  

In urban America, it's easy to forget about "our other half" of who we are as a nation of Americans. Rural America, where my roots extend, continues to keep me humble and remind me of my endurance, grittiness, and resilience.