Are You in a Summer Motivational Lull? About that...my summer sabbatical

I've written before on cycles of performance and rest. This is why I took a mini-sabbatical for the month of July. The nature of having four weeks in a row to let go was important to the spaciousness I was trying to create.

I want to share with you how it went.

Turns out, it wasn't as spacious as I had hoped it would be. But, I did learn a few things.

Can I tell you the punchline up front? I was bored!

The first week involved an extended family clean-out project that wasn't boring at all. It was a great way to dive into "time off" because it pulled my attention away from my work and was physically taxing.

But for the remaining weeks, I started to feel intellectually under-stimulated. And to be honest, it wasn't that comfortable. 

This discomfort taught me a few things about myself. How might I be leaning on my intellect for a sense of self-worth? In other words, why isn't a day at the beach innately satisfying for me? Am I ok with that, or is it a clue to a change I want to create?

In week four, the final week of my July mini-sabbatical, I got COVID. That was really the icing on the boredom cake, if you will, because not being well meant even more downtime.

In short, the pendulum swung too far into the intellectually under-stimulating and not-rejeuvenating-enough category.

This might lead you to wonder – does this mean my sabbatical was a failure? 

Absolutely not. It did exactly what it was supposed to do. It helped me find mental space. I just didn't like that mental space when it was there because it was too much. That leaves me curious about what "my" right amount is on the spectrum from overwhelming and overstimulating to boring and uninspiring. How do I get to that middle ‘sweet spot’ where things are spacious and also interesting and creative.

Now, I didn't have profound insights about the strategic direction of my business or tackle my 'high hanging fruit', but I did gain awareness around a few other things: 

I came away with even more conviction for the spaciousness my very full weeks need to include.

I learned that I need to make a strong plan for the solitude that I inherently need in order to feel connected and capable. I worked with my executive assistant to make some key changes to my calendar that will allow for "free time" starting in the fall. My wheels are turning on weekly rhythms around exercise and family meal planning. In short, I am asking the question at a new level as to how my work rhythms can ward off burnout and include enough spaciousness to allow for inspiration, more health, and whatever else I feel like that day.

I learned that I can tolerate the discomfort of boredom.

Boredom may be uncomfortable in the moment, and it can have such inertia that comes with it. When I get in a boredom rut, I have trouble getting interested in things. That said, I know that boredom serves a purpose. I can tolerate the discomfort of my boredom because I know that it precedes insights and newness of some sort. I don't yet know what that will look like, and that keeps me intrigued. The key is trusting it will come.

My internal compass got stronger.

I now feel more adept at asking and answering to myself the simple, yet powerful question: what do I want? Needs are in there too. Cultivating this vision on a daily, weekly, monthly, annual, and 3-5-year scale means I have a stronger foundation for building out the strategy for how my work in the world will continue to manifest itself..

Work is one of the ways in which we offer our gifts to the world for our brief time here on Earth. But work isn't our full life, even though it may feel like it sometimes. My sabbatical helped me reconnect to the foundation underneath my work. The image from the Lion King comes to mind when Mufasa’s ghost in the sky tells Simba,  “Remember who you are.”